That is not a sentence I ever imagined I would be writing in my newsletter, but here we are.

I have been reluctant to go to therapy and to ask for help for far too long. Not because I did not think it could help, but because my past experiences with counseling were mixed. During my marriage, we had struggles, just like every other couple. We did couples counseling, and it did not feel very effective. Looking back, I think a big part of that was simple: it is very hard for counseling to work when there is not real buy-in from both people.

Later, I spoke to a therapist individually, and that experience was actually very helpful. It gave me clarity at a time when I needed it most. It helped confirm something I already knew deep down, that getting divorced was the right decision.

Even with that experience, I still stayed away from therapy.

I think once something gets associated with a painful season of life, it can be hard to go back to it. Even when you know it might help, part of you still resists. That has definitely been true for me.

At the same time, life has not exactly been light lately.

There is the business, which continues to grow, and with growth comes more responsibility, more moving parts, and more decisions. I am getting better at asking for help there. I am getting better at not trying to do everything myself. But even with that progress, I still feel overwhelmed more often than I would like to admit.

And then there is everything outside of work.

My nephew died by suicide. My youngest son hasn't spoken to me in almost two years. My parents need much more care than they used to. This is causing tension between my siblings and me. I feel guilty for not living closer so I can help more. And I feel a strong sense of responsibility to be there for my brother as he tries to live through the unimaginable pain of losing his son.

That is a lot.

Writing it out like that almost feels strange, because part of my habit has been to downplay it all. To carry it quietly. To try to make sure I am not bothering anyone else. To take on the burden myself so other people do not have to.

But that way of coping has a cost.

Eva, along with several other people close to me, has been encouraging me to go to therapy. My business coach pushed especially hard, and I am grateful she did. She insisted I start, and I promised her I would. So I booked weekly sessions for the next month.

I had my first session last week. It was incredibly helpful.

Not in some magical, everything-is-fixed-now kind of way. More in the sense that I could feel almost immediately that I had finally stepped toward something I have needed for a long time. It helped me see just how much I am carrying. It helped me realize how often I try to protect everyone else by keeping things to myself. It helped me recognize that this is not strength. Not really. At some point, it becomes self-neglect.

And that hit me harder than I expected.

After just one session, I already felt better. Lighter. Clearer. Not because my problems disappeared, but because I stopped trying to hold all of them alone.

I also left with a strong feeling that this is not a short-term fix for me. This is a long-term solution. Or maybe a better way to say it is this: it feels like a long-term commitment to taking better care of myself.

I wish I had started sooner.

I know there are a lot of people who are probably in the same place I was. You know you need help. You know talking to someone would probably be good for you. But you keep waiting. You tell yourself you can handle it. You tell yourself other people have it worse. You tell yourself now is not the right time. You tell yourself you do not want to burden anyone.

I understand that thinking because I have lived in it.

But waiting does not make it easier.

Getting help is not weakness. It is not failure. It is not an admission that you cannot cope. Sometimes it is the clearest sign that you are finally being honest with yourself.

That is what this has felt like for me.

If you have been putting this off, maybe let this be your nudge. Do not wait until it is too late. Do not wait until you are completely underwater. Do not assume you have to carry everything by yourself just because you have managed to do that up until now.

You do not.

I am very early in this process, but I am already glad I started.

And for me, that is enough to know I should have done it sooner.

If this is something you have been putting off, please do not wait as long as I did. Talk to someone. Tell a friend. Book the appointment. Ask for help before things feel unbearable, not after. There are people who know how to help, and there are services built for the moments when life feels too heavy.

If you are in the UK or Ireland, Samaritans is available 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. You can call 116 123 for free, and Samaritans also offers support by email at jo@samaritans.org.

If you are in England and need urgent mental health help, the NHS says you can get immediate expert advice and assessment, and in many places you can contact NHS 111 for urgent mental health support. If someone is in immediate danger or at serious risk of harm, call 999.

If you are in the United States, the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline offers free, confidential support 24/7 by call, text, or chat. Another option is Crisis Text Line, where you can text HOME to 741741 for free, confidential support.

Please reach out to someone today, even if all you can say is, “I’m not doing very well, and I need some help.” That sentence can be the start of something getting better.

Call a friend or family member you think might be struggling, no matter what it is, and tell them you love them.

I promise it will help.

– Andy